Getting older

I think it's such a strange thing that when I was growing up there was not much more that I wanted than to be older.  Maybe it was the older sister I had or the fact that, no matter my age, there was always somebody older than me and I thought the grass was greener on their side of the fence.  That last thought is funny because as I approach my 42nd birthday (42!!), I was reminded by a 76 year old friend last night that I'm still a young chicken.

So, now that I am getting older it also means that so is everyone else around me and I am more and more aware of how short our time is on this crazy Earth.  I was very moved by the passing this past week of Elizabeth Edwards and the coverage of her funeral services yesterday.  I couldn't help but, like many of us, think about her children and what a tremendous loss they have just experienced.  This year of 2010 has also been especially difficult in my own little world with all of the health scares and tough situations we have faced in our families.  It's hard not to let myself start believing this is what getting older is about....watching the decline of others and worrying more and more about who is next?  Again, not an all consuming set of thoughts, but certainly more prevalent in these past months than ever before in my 42 years.

But, getting older also brings many good things:  confidence, a sense of purpose, wisdom, and an appreciation of life and those with whom I am lucky enough to share it.  Those silly thoughts of invincibility and not having to be super-accountable in my earlier days almost seems like a different life to me.  And, yet, it was my life a few short years ago and not so long ago that I don't remember it.  I would like to believe that I HAVE gained some wisdom over the years and have learned so much about what life can offer.  Never before have the words "Live every day like it's your last" made so much sense to me as it does lately.