Yikes....if I were being graded on my blog posting I have a feeling I would not be passing. Thus, the title of today's entry: Where does the time go?
Here I sit on the Monday evening of Memorial Day weekend wondering where this weekend went much less the last 2 months since my last entry. It's amazing how easy it is to let the routine of life (see my last posting) take hold. So, on this 88 degree evening sitting out on our patio listening to the gentle wind push the palm fronds to and fro, I thought I better dig deep and start examining life again.
Once again, it's the crazy steps we take in life that really seem to shake things up. But, does it always have to take money? After several months of trying to sell it privately, we took the plunge on Friday afternoon and drove to our local car dealer to see what luck we would have trading my car in for something newer. Luckily, having been through that exercise about a month ago, we were fully prepared for the inevitable haggling that seems to define the car buying process. Just once I would like to walk into a car dealership, see the car I want and walk out 15 minutes later with nothing but a smile on my face. All in all, this deal wasn't a hard one but I still have to wonder why our capitalist society rears it's worst ugliness in the musty confines of car dealerships? Why take up 3 or 4 hours of my time getting to the point where I'm ready to sign the paperwork? It could have been done so much more quickly and without all the back and forth with the Wizard of Oz-like manager murmuring "Don't pay attention to what's behind the curtain!" Just get it done, sir, and lets call it a day, shall we?
Time really does seem to be flying by. I had the epiphany last week that I could have a college-aged child right now. My Mom was my age when she dropped me off at college 20 years ago! 1991 seems like yesterday and, yet, that is the birth year of one of the students I met last week. Dang.
We always hear how we need to stop and smell the roses every now and then. I believe it needs to be more often. Oh, and just for the record....the trip to Colorado in April was a BLAST and delivered on reminding me why life needs to include a crazy moment every now and then!
Monday, May 30, 2011
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Breaking routines and finding the joie de vivre
Wake up. Eat a bite. Go the gym. Back home to drink coffee and eat breakfast. Spot clean the house. Get ready for work. Work. Come home for dinner. Watch some TV or read. Go to bed. Repeat......
Sound familiar to anyone? I was recently struck by how repetitive daily life can become unless fully conscious of how little I am doing to change things up once in a while. I'm not saying that routines are bad or an unnecessary part of life. In fact, I'm surprised by how unstructured some folks can seem to live their day-to-day life and often wonder how they do it? As a fairly linear thinker, I find that I am often thinking of ways to streamline my life which ultimately leads to an efficient but all too predictable outcome. What led to this epiphany? A simple act of spontaneity and a bit of irresponsibility. But is that such a bad thing? I say not.
In this age of tightening our belts given the sad state of the economy and gasoline prices that can break our budgets, I realized about a week ago that it had been a looooong time since I did anything "just because." The inspiration was my desire to book a flight to surprise my Mom for her pre-birthday weekend at the end of April only to learn that she was planning to be in Colorado that weekend. Rather than give up on my desire to be wild and crazy, we shifted our plans to fly to Colorado and now find ourselves booked for what should be an amazing, albeit expensive, long weekend. But, I have ZERO regrets for doing it. In fact, I started to realize that even my attempt to surprise my Mom for her birthday was, in some ways, just the same ol' routine: book a flight on Alaska Airlines, fly to Portland, spend time with Mom in Vancouver, fly home. While it would be have been wonderful, this Colorado trip has totally energized me and is something I'm looking forward to more than I could have ever imagined.
What I have I learned? Sure, changing up the route I take to work every once in a while helps. Planning different meals is a good start. Changing my hair style.....er....wait, that isn't even possible. My lesson for myself is that sometimes you just have to throw responsibility and practicality out the proverbial window and do something just because it's new, fresh, and energizing. As the old saying, "You only live once" rings in my head, I'm listening intently and taking it to heart.
What are YOU going to do to break your routine and reignite your joie de vivre?
Sound familiar to anyone? I was recently struck by how repetitive daily life can become unless fully conscious of how little I am doing to change things up once in a while. I'm not saying that routines are bad or an unnecessary part of life. In fact, I'm surprised by how unstructured some folks can seem to live their day-to-day life and often wonder how they do it? As a fairly linear thinker, I find that I am often thinking of ways to streamline my life which ultimately leads to an efficient but all too predictable outcome. What led to this epiphany? A simple act of spontaneity and a bit of irresponsibility. But is that such a bad thing? I say not.
In this age of tightening our belts given the sad state of the economy and gasoline prices that can break our budgets, I realized about a week ago that it had been a looooong time since I did anything "just because." The inspiration was my desire to book a flight to surprise my Mom for her pre-birthday weekend at the end of April only to learn that she was planning to be in Colorado that weekend. Rather than give up on my desire to be wild and crazy, we shifted our plans to fly to Colorado and now find ourselves booked for what should be an amazing, albeit expensive, long weekend. But, I have ZERO regrets for doing it. In fact, I started to realize that even my attempt to surprise my Mom for her birthday was, in some ways, just the same ol' routine: book a flight on Alaska Airlines, fly to Portland, spend time with Mom in Vancouver, fly home. While it would be have been wonderful, this Colorado trip has totally energized me and is something I'm looking forward to more than I could have ever imagined.
What I have I learned? Sure, changing up the route I take to work every once in a while helps. Planning different meals is a good start. Changing my hair style.....er....wait, that isn't even possible. My lesson for myself is that sometimes you just have to throw responsibility and practicality out the proverbial window and do something just because it's new, fresh, and energizing. As the old saying, "You only live once" rings in my head, I'm listening intently and taking it to heart.
What are YOU going to do to break your routine and reignite your joie de vivre?
Friday, January 14, 2011
Breathing it all in 2011
Happy New Year (14 days later!):
Much like the written journal I keep, it is amazing how quickly time passes and what seemed like yesterday is, in reality, 14 days later. I had every good intention of writing to welcome in 2011 (and put a thankful end to 2010), but perhaps my last few hours of vacation from work took priority? Just maybe.
Faithful readers of this blog (or those patient enough to scroll through the history) are fully aware of the miracle my family experienced this past October. That miracle was driven home even moreso today when I completed my first, of what will likely be many, CPR class. If you are CPR-certified, you know firsthand that what I am about to share is true.
Walking into the class today, I expected the "dummy" Annie, a little breathing into her plastic 1/2 body and pounding on her chest, and some awkward role-playing to make sure I know the steps involved in performing effective CPR. Annie was there (though I think she actually sent her less feminine counterpart, Art), we role-played, and, oh yes, we learned how to appropriately perform "chest compressions"....a nice way of saying I'm probably about to crack or, worse, break some ribs. 5 sets of 30 repetitive up and down compressions on Art's 1/2 body at a rate equivalent to the beat of the song "Staying Alive" proved to be quite a workout for all of us. Each and every compression I practiced reminded me of the incredible 12 minutes my Mom's husband, Shawn, performed this incredible act of love on her last October which nobody denies is the only reason she is, thankfully, still with us today. It has been several hours since the class and I'm still amazed at the feat Shawn accomplished.
As I reflect on the past 14 days and think about the important skill I learned earlier today, it puts life back into perspective and forces me to consider what I hope 2011 will represent. I also wonder if this will be the start of a new tradition at the start of each New Year: taking the act of resolution-making to a new level by learning something not only personally beneficial, but also that could benefit those most important in my life....and maybe even a stranger or two.
How about you? What have you done or do you plan to do to make 2011 a little less about yourself and more about learning or doing something from which others may benefit? Think about it and do it soon to avoid the passing of time that becomes such an easy excuse for not taking action.
Much like the written journal I keep, it is amazing how quickly time passes and what seemed like yesterday is, in reality, 14 days later. I had every good intention of writing to welcome in 2011 (and put a thankful end to 2010), but perhaps my last few hours of vacation from work took priority? Just maybe.
Faithful readers of this blog (or those patient enough to scroll through the history) are fully aware of the miracle my family experienced this past October. That miracle was driven home even moreso today when I completed my first, of what will likely be many, CPR class. If you are CPR-certified, you know firsthand that what I am about to share is true.
Walking into the class today, I expected the "dummy" Annie, a little breathing into her plastic 1/2 body and pounding on her chest, and some awkward role-playing to make sure I know the steps involved in performing effective CPR. Annie was there (though I think she actually sent her less feminine counterpart, Art), we role-played, and, oh yes, we learned how to appropriately perform "chest compressions"....a nice way of saying I'm probably about to crack or, worse, break some ribs. 5 sets of 30 repetitive up and down compressions on Art's 1/2 body at a rate equivalent to the beat of the song "Staying Alive" proved to be quite a workout for all of us. Each and every compression I practiced reminded me of the incredible 12 minutes my Mom's husband, Shawn, performed this incredible act of love on her last October which nobody denies is the only reason she is, thankfully, still with us today. It has been several hours since the class and I'm still amazed at the feat Shawn accomplished.
As I reflect on the past 14 days and think about the important skill I learned earlier today, it puts life back into perspective and forces me to consider what I hope 2011 will represent. I also wonder if this will be the start of a new tradition at the start of each New Year: taking the act of resolution-making to a new level by learning something not only personally beneficial, but also that could benefit those most important in my life....and maybe even a stranger or two.
How about you? What have you done or do you plan to do to make 2011 a little less about yourself and more about learning or doing something from which others may benefit? Think about it and do it soon to avoid the passing of time that becomes such an easy excuse for not taking action.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Peeling the onion that is ElderCare
I have been thrown into the wide world of wading through all of the information we need to have/understand in order to help our aging parents...and all I can liken it to is an onion. The more I look at just a handful of websites I have found regarding the subject, the more I feel like I am just beginning to peel back the many layers of an onion. It's almost overwhelming.
Felipe and his brother and sisters are all of a sudden faced with the reality of having to explore what option is next for their Mom. Assisted Living? In home care? Moving her in with one of the kids? It's amazing how many myths (or more appropriately, facts) we as children don't know. For instance: knowing the difference between Medicare (don't even start bringing up Medicare A, B, or C) and MediCal/MedicAid. Distinguishing between Nursing Home care and Assisted Living care....and who will/can help pay for it? ADLs....Activities of Daily Living and their importance. How do families cover the cost of elder care? And then I have to start thinking about myself: can I afford Long Term Care insurance right now? Is it worth the additional expense to my current list of expenses? The answer to the last question, given what I have experienced with Felipe's Mom, is a resounding yes and something I better figure out how to afford.
While I am not happy that we are having to explore all of this for Felipe's mom, it sure is an eye-opening experience for us both and something I am so fortunate to have the chance to do at my "leisure" versus having to do it "in the moment." Frankly, I'm not sure how families would deal with all of this on the spot because of the amount of information and unknowns that exist with all of this.
The best websites I have found so far to help navigate this process are AgingParents.com and Caring.com. Both have some valuable information. I especially enjoyed the podcasts on the first website that cover a wide variety of topics. The other surprisingly helpful website is the State of California's website dealing specifically with insurance. As I have started learning more about the importance of biting the bullet to invest in long term care insurance for myself, there is some great information on the State's website regarding what to consider.
Know that I welcome any and all suggestions from anyone.
Felipe and his brother and sisters are all of a sudden faced with the reality of having to explore what option is next for their Mom. Assisted Living? In home care? Moving her in with one of the kids? It's amazing how many myths (or more appropriately, facts) we as children don't know. For instance: knowing the difference between Medicare (don't even start bringing up Medicare A, B, or C) and MediCal/MedicAid. Distinguishing between Nursing Home care and Assisted Living care....and who will/can help pay for it? ADLs....Activities of Daily Living and their importance. How do families cover the cost of elder care? And then I have to start thinking about myself: can I afford Long Term Care insurance right now? Is it worth the additional expense to my current list of expenses? The answer to the last question, given what I have experienced with Felipe's Mom, is a resounding yes and something I better figure out how to afford.
While I am not happy that we are having to explore all of this for Felipe's mom, it sure is an eye-opening experience for us both and something I am so fortunate to have the chance to do at my "leisure" versus having to do it "in the moment." Frankly, I'm not sure how families would deal with all of this on the spot because of the amount of information and unknowns that exist with all of this.
The best websites I have found so far to help navigate this process are AgingParents.com and Caring.com. Both have some valuable information. I especially enjoyed the podcasts on the first website that cover a wide variety of topics. The other surprisingly helpful website is the State of California's website dealing specifically with insurance. As I have started learning more about the importance of biting the bullet to invest in long term care insurance for myself, there is some great information on the State's website regarding what to consider.
Know that I welcome any and all suggestions from anyone.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Getting older
I think it's such a strange thing that when I was growing up there was not much more that I wanted than to be older. Maybe it was the older sister I had or the fact that, no matter my age, there was always somebody older than me and I thought the grass was greener on their side of the fence. That last thought is funny because as I approach my 42nd birthday (42!!), I was reminded by a 76 year old friend last night that I'm still a young chicken.
So, now that I am getting older it also means that so is everyone else around me and I am more and more aware of how short our time is on this crazy Earth. I was very moved by the passing this past week of Elizabeth Edwards and the coverage of her funeral services yesterday. I couldn't help but, like many of us, think about her children and what a tremendous loss they have just experienced. This year of 2010 has also been especially difficult in my own little world with all of the health scares and tough situations we have faced in our families. It's hard not to let myself start believing this is what getting older is about....watching the decline of others and worrying more and more about who is next? Again, not an all consuming set of thoughts, but certainly more prevalent in these past months than ever before in my 42 years.
But, getting older also brings many good things: confidence, a sense of purpose, wisdom, and an appreciation of life and those with whom I am lucky enough to share it. Those silly thoughts of invincibility and not having to be super-accountable in my earlier days almost seems like a different life to me. And, yet, it was my life a few short years ago and not so long ago that I don't remember it. I would like to believe that I HAVE gained some wisdom over the years and have learned so much about what life can offer. Never before have the words "Live every day like it's your last" made so much sense to me as it does lately.
So, now that I am getting older it also means that so is everyone else around me and I am more and more aware of how short our time is on this crazy Earth. I was very moved by the passing this past week of Elizabeth Edwards and the coverage of her funeral services yesterday. I couldn't help but, like many of us, think about her children and what a tremendous loss they have just experienced. This year of 2010 has also been especially difficult in my own little world with all of the health scares and tough situations we have faced in our families. It's hard not to let myself start believing this is what getting older is about....watching the decline of others and worrying more and more about who is next? Again, not an all consuming set of thoughts, but certainly more prevalent in these past months than ever before in my 42 years.
But, getting older also brings many good things: confidence, a sense of purpose, wisdom, and an appreciation of life and those with whom I am lucky enough to share it. Those silly thoughts of invincibility and not having to be super-accountable in my earlier days almost seems like a different life to me. And, yet, it was my life a few short years ago and not so long ago that I don't remember it. I would like to believe that I HAVE gained some wisdom over the years and have learned so much about what life can offer. Never before have the words "Live every day like it's your last" made so much sense to me as it does lately.
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Feeling content
As I sit here waiting for Felipe, his sister and her partner to arrive, I can't help but to feel this sense of contentment. It's been a wild last couple of months, but it's always nice to have this chance to just sit and reflect on things. Spent most of today doing yard work and errands and just showered (it's about 3:15 right now!) so I could sit down with the ol' laptop, a good cup of tea, and have a few more minutes of relaxation before the gang arrives. It doesn't hurt that it's about 72 degrees, the sun is shining, and the doors and windows are open. THIS is why I live here.
So my question to ponder today is how to have this kind of day be the more prevalent kind of day than the rat race kind of days we usually experience? Does meditation provide that to folks? In all honesty, my days are pretty mellow (see an earlier post about moving my office location to a more remote part of the building), but there is always the constant e-mail and telephone interruptions. I have actually been feeling really good about work these days and really taking stock of how much my students appreciate me and how proud I am of the work that I do.
I hope you are having a good day, too, and will share what you do to bring yourself to a "happy place."
So my question to ponder today is how to have this kind of day be the more prevalent kind of day than the rat race kind of days we usually experience? Does meditation provide that to folks? In all honesty, my days are pretty mellow (see an earlier post about moving my office location to a more remote part of the building), but there is always the constant e-mail and telephone interruptions. I have actually been feeling really good about work these days and really taking stock of how much my students appreciate me and how proud I am of the work that I do.
I hope you are having a good day, too, and will share what you do to bring yourself to a "happy place."
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Family matters...
Maybe it's the season, maybe it's been my life this past month, maybe it's because it's Sunday. Who knows, but all I can seem to think about lately is how important the concept of "family" is to me and how loosely that term can be used sometimes.
We were pleased to have Felipe's Mom and sister here with us this weekend for an early Thanksgiving dinner since we will be in Vancouver with MY Mom for the real turkey deal in 9 days. I loved spending time with them...even the couple of hours where it was just me and Pilar and a slight language barrier between us. (My Spanish is only strong enough to catch every 3rd or 4th word she says to me, but at least I try, right?) I loved hearing the stories (some I've heard, many I haven't) their family shares and enjoying the great laughs that came along with each. But, like every other visit we have with them, it made me yearn to be with my family and to rekindle the fun, frustration, and genuine love we have for one another. It also makes me shudder to think of the many earlier visits we wasted with fighting, tension, or other general nonsense that I rationalize as being part of why we are so close today.
I have also been reminded and made more keenly aware this week about how precious time with our families is and how thankful (maybe it IS the season?!) and lucky I consider myself. It was tough to learn that a not-so-close acquaintance of mine from college lost her father unexpectedly this week and how my mind immediately thought of her mother and recalled how close I remember all of them being. How could this happen right before Thanksgiving? I also started thinking about a 75 year old friend of ours and all that she must be feeling right now as the holidays approach and remind her of the loss of her companion 6 years ago at this time of year on top of knowing that her elderly sister (and sole remaining immediate family member) is having a difficult time with her health in Canada. Lastly, to learn that one of the instructors where I work also unexpectedly lost her sister this week really brought the fragility of life and time with family front and center in my thoughts.
It's interesting to me that most of us begin life with our family under the same roof and, at least in my case, don't really understand the strong bonds that are being forged until we are on our own and leading our own lives. And yet, even as I lead my own life I am reminded on almost a daily basis about why I am the way I am and who played a part in getting me there. I find myself trying to see similar connections that those around me have with their families and discovering the similarities - and differences - each of us have with members of our family all the while knowing those bonds really do matter. In some strange way, I think Felipe and I have imparted how important family is with our "kids" and they, in their own canine way, have their own appreciation for what we have provided in our home.
I have worked in many situations where those with whom I work have tried to compare and call what we have at work a "family" and I have always bristled at that notion. Not sure why. If it means in close proximity, sure. If it means comes with crazy interpersonal dynamics, right on. But it doesn't work for me to equate a 40 hour work week with a genuine desire to want to be with and understand the people who play such a vital role in my evolution as an individual. My true family matters most to me and I would venture to guess the same is true for you.
My early wishes to you and yours for multiple opportunities to spend time with those that matter most during this holiday season: family.
We were pleased to have Felipe's Mom and sister here with us this weekend for an early Thanksgiving dinner since we will be in Vancouver with MY Mom for the real turkey deal in 9 days. I loved spending time with them...even the couple of hours where it was just me and Pilar and a slight language barrier between us. (My Spanish is only strong enough to catch every 3rd or 4th word she says to me, but at least I try, right?) I loved hearing the stories (some I've heard, many I haven't) their family shares and enjoying the great laughs that came along with each. But, like every other visit we have with them, it made me yearn to be with my family and to rekindle the fun, frustration, and genuine love we have for one another. It also makes me shudder to think of the many earlier visits we wasted with fighting, tension, or other general nonsense that I rationalize as being part of why we are so close today.
I have also been reminded and made more keenly aware this week about how precious time with our families is and how thankful (maybe it IS the season?!) and lucky I consider myself. It was tough to learn that a not-so-close acquaintance of mine from college lost her father unexpectedly this week and how my mind immediately thought of her mother and recalled how close I remember all of them being. How could this happen right before Thanksgiving? I also started thinking about a 75 year old friend of ours and all that she must be feeling right now as the holidays approach and remind her of the loss of her companion 6 years ago at this time of year on top of knowing that her elderly sister (and sole remaining immediate family member) is having a difficult time with her health in Canada. Lastly, to learn that one of the instructors where I work also unexpectedly lost her sister this week really brought the fragility of life and time with family front and center in my thoughts.
It's interesting to me that most of us begin life with our family under the same roof and, at least in my case, don't really understand the strong bonds that are being forged until we are on our own and leading our own lives. And yet, even as I lead my own life I am reminded on almost a daily basis about why I am the way I am and who played a part in getting me there. I find myself trying to see similar connections that those around me have with their families and discovering the similarities - and differences - each of us have with members of our family all the while knowing those bonds really do matter. In some strange way, I think Felipe and I have imparted how important family is with our "kids" and they, in their own canine way, have their own appreciation for what we have provided in our home.
I have worked in many situations where those with whom I work have tried to compare and call what we have at work a "family" and I have always bristled at that notion. Not sure why. If it means in close proximity, sure. If it means comes with crazy interpersonal dynamics, right on. But it doesn't work for me to equate a 40 hour work week with a genuine desire to want to be with and understand the people who play such a vital role in my evolution as an individual. My true family matters most to me and I would venture to guess the same is true for you.
My early wishes to you and yours for multiple opportunities to spend time with those that matter most during this holiday season: family.
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